"When God Hurts Your Feelings" by Lysa TerKeurst

"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:12-13 (NIV 1984)

Has God ever hurt your feelings? I'll be honest, sometimes I'll read those verses from Philippians listed above and think to myself, "This is a tough pill to swallow."

Content in any and every situation?

Really?

Several years ago my daughter was a state champion gymnast. To see her do gymnastics was like looking at God smile. She was beautiful, graceful, and captivating to watch.

One night while practicing for one of the largest tournaments she'd ever compete in, she fell. It was a move she'd done hundreds of times with the greatest of ease. But this time something went terribly wrong and that one mistake ended her gymnastic dreams.

We spent a year going from doctor to doctor only to be told she'd never be able to support the weight of her body on her injured shoulder again.

I'll be honest, this was heart wrenching. Watching a 14 year old girl wrestle with the fact her dreams were stripped from her doesn't exactly lend itself to feelings of contentment. Now, I know in the grand scheme of life, people face much worse situations. But in her world, this was huge.

It was so tempting to wallow in the "why" questions and tell God He'd hurt our feelings.

Why did this happen?

Why didn't You stop this God?

Why weren't my prayers answered?

Have you ever been there? Have you ever had a big situation in your life where you just couldn't process why God would allow this to happen? Or maybe even a small annoyance like losing your keys or having a flat tire on a morning you really needed to be somewhere.

It's so tempting to wallow in the why.

Asking why is perfectly normal. Asking why isn't unspiritual. However, if asking why pushes us farther from God rather than drawing us closer to Him, it is the wrong question.

If asking why doesn't offer hope, what will?

The what question.

In other words: "Now that this is my reality, what am I supposed to do with it?"

Philippians 4:8, "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." (NIV)

I like to call this verse "directions on where to park my mind."

And that's exactly what Ashley has had to do with her dashed gymnastics dreams. Instead of wallowing in why did this happen, I've had to help her say:

This is my reality, now what am I going to do with it?

What can I learn from this?

What part of this is for my protection?

What other opportunities could God be providing?

What maturity could God be building into me?

Switching from the why to the what question paves the road to parking our mind in a much better place.

Is it always easy? Nope.

But is it a way to find a perspective beyond situations where we feel God has allowed something in our lives we don't understand and we absolutely don't like? Yes.

I pray this helps you today. You can also download a free resource on how to change your why questions into what questions. Just go to my blog, www.LysaTerKeurst.com and click on the button "When God Hurts Your Feelings."

Dear Lord, I want to process everything I face in life through the filter of Your love. I know You love me. But sometimes it's just hard to understand the circumstances that come my way. I find myself consumed with trying to figure things out rather than looking for Your perspective and trusting You. Thank You for this new way to look at things. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Application Steps:
Mentally walk yourself through parking your mind in a better place by remembering an event that happened this week and looking for God's protection, provision and process of maturing you.

Reflections:
Am I afraid to have honest conversations with God about how I really feel about some of my circumstances?

How might it be helpful to really talk to God about things that hurt me?

Why is it helpful to ask what now, instead of wallowing in the why questions?

Power Verses:
Isaiah 55:8-9, "'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the LORD. 'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.'" (NIV 1984)

Losing Your Way and Regaining Your Momentum: Where Did It Fall?

So, this short entry and its title is inspired by a series of messages preached by Pastor Steven Furtick of Elevation Church in Charlotte, NC. The series focused on Christians regaining their momentum for Christ. I'd like to take that thought and relate it to life. Looking at my recent posts it's obvious I haven't been attending to this blog, and the reason was simple. I had lost my way during this time of change. Basically, I gave up. Change--especially long periods of change--is not easy. There's a lot of struggle, sacrifice, and questioning with some of the questions being, "Am I really doing the right thing?", "Am I trying too hard to get where I want to be in life?", "Am I trying too hard to become something that I'm not," & "How do I keep dealing with these failures?" But all of these supposed hindrances are just life's stepping stones to take us towards the change we're searching after. I encourage you to continue on this journey of shedding old thoughts, ideas, and/or perceptions, because they can't be a part of where you're going. If they could have been, you would've reached your destination by now.

"...to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness..." (Isa 61:3 KJV)

"You can't expect beauty if you continue to hold onto your ashes." - Joyce Meyer [paraphrased]

Your Past Is Calling. Should You Answer?

This entry was inspired by a message preached at my church yesterday. I wasn't there for the service, however the gist of the message was that your ex is calling you but you should leave your past behind. Your ex in this case would be past experiences in your life. So I'm reframing the message to ask should you answer when your past is calling you?

What do I mean by your past? Well, I'm thinking of the reminders of your faults and mistakes. The things that you should or shouldn't have done and the things that you should or shouldn't have said. And oh yeah, what about when you let go of your standard(s)? Your past is calling to make you reflect on the times that you've failed--be it others, yourself, or God. Are you going to take the time to stop and answer the call by wasting time thinking on your past?

I said it's a waste of time to think on your past because, as the old saying goes, there is nothing that can be done about it. Granted you can try to correct some of your mistakes, but the actions that took place cannot be changed. It's helpful to learn from your mistakes and failures. When you do that, you know what roads not to take when it comes to making decisions or choices in your life. However, dwelling on your past failures only keeps you bogged down in the present. Your desire may be to move forward, but how can you when you're so busy looking at the past?

I'll talk about me and may be that will help. I've made mistakes that I've dwelt on over and over and over again. In other words, my past was calling and I took the time to answer. I thought about, "Well, if I hadn't done that, maybe this would have been different," or, "Why did you let that happen? You knew better." Yet, the one thought that has tripped me up the most is, "Now I can't look down on others." Yep, I said it. In my recent past, the idea that as long as you stay focused you won't make certain mistakes has not been my reality. But when I stop to look at it, how sad is that? How sad is it to have a standard not so much to help others but to be able to look down on others and judge in your head and your heart internally (although you may never judge them verbally)?

Okay, this post may not be for everybody, and I may respin it to make it more general another day. But to those who can relate, let me say this. Stop answering the call of your past. You and I have made mistakes, and guess what we've learned? We're human. That's what humans do. However, do we use our humanity to continue to make intentional mistakes? No, we do not. Nor do we continue to try and live a life that allows us to look down on those who aren't living up to our standard. We take the mistakes, learn from them, leave them in the past, and move on with life. The lessons learned from them have the ability to make us stronger because now we have a better understanding of our weaknesses. We no longer depend upon our integrity because we realize we're just as human as the next person. Perfection doesn't stop here, and we should no longer expect it to.

So when your past comes calling, don't answer. It's not worth your time.


John 8:1-11 KJV

v. 1 Jesus went unto the mount of Olives.
v. 2 And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.
v. 3 And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,
v. 4 They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.
v. 5 Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?
v. 6 This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.
v. 7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.
v. 8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.
v. 9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.
v. 10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
v. 11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

When We Fall...

This was yesterday's Encouragement For Today devotional. It was written by Renee Swope.

Getting Up Again

"...though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again..." Proverbs 24:16a, (NIV)

I've always admired people who aren't afraid to fail. You know the ones who don't even consider defeat when they blow it; people who see a personal setback as just another goal to conquer.

I'm not always so courageous. In fact, I can be really hard on myself when I fail, and it doesn't even have to be a biggie. You see, I have what I call a "meanie in me" who replays my mistakes over and over, reminding me of how badly I've disappointed someone, or how impatient I was with my husband, or how harsh I was with my kids, or all sorts of ways that I fell short that day.

But the greatest defeat comes when I allow a mistake, a bad decision, sin, or a broken relationship to convince me that I might as well give up. Perhaps you have also allowed failure to knock you down, tie you up with the ropes of regret and hold you hostage like I have.

When I surveyed over 1200 women for my upcoming book, A Confident Heart, I discovered that our past failures, and our fear of failing again, are two of the biggest triggers that make us doubt ourselves.

Today's key verse, Proverbs 24:16, has helped me release the regret, guilt, fear and shame that have weighed me down and held me back. Take a minute to read it now and notice how it says the righteous will fall. That is right. Even those of us who have received the gift of Christ's righteousness and redemption will fall down. But we were never intended to stay down.

Instead of giving up Jesus empowers us to get up again.

In getting up, we can apologize and ask for forgiveness. In getting up, we can choose to try again with our kids, in our jobs, in our ministries, in our marriages, and in all of our mistakes. Because we trust that although we fall, God will help us up. Listen to His promise in Psalm 37:23-24 and as you read it insert your name in the blanks: "The steps of ____________ are established by the Lord, and He delights in ____________ way. When ____________ falls, __________ will not be hurled headlong, because the Lord is the One who holds ________ hand." (NASB)

When we get up again failure can actually help us become the confident women God created us to be because it makes us stronger and better — when we go to God for help. Failure can stretch us to do more than we think we can and push us to try other methods of doing things when one way doesn't work.

Yes, failure can be hurtful but it can also be beneficial. Failure produces wisdom when we ask for it and maturity when we learn from it.

The truth is, following Jesus is not about avoiding failures and being perfect. It's about accepting our weaknesses and becoming more dependent on God's perfect love and power at work in us. So the next time you fail to be the woman He calls you to be, or the woman you expect yourself to be, ask God to remind you of this truth.

We will sometimes fail to be who we want to be but we will get closer to who we are meant to be every time we fall and then choose to take God's hand so we can get up again!

Lord, I'm so thankful for Your grace that reminds me there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Because my steps are established by You, Lord, I will believe that You delight in me even when I fail or fall. Today, I want to take Your hand and trust Your heart as You pull me back up again and use my failures to help me become the confident woman You created me to be. In Jesus' Name, amen.

Application Steps:
List one or two areas of your life where you have felt like you were failing and wanted to give up — mainly on yourself. Then ask God to show you how you can get back up with His help.

Reflections:
Have I ever wanted to give up? What got me to that hard place and how can I receive God's grace and rely on His strength instead of my own?

Power Verses:
Psalm 37:23-24, "The steps of a man are established by the Lord, and He delights in his way. When he falls, he will not be hurled headlong, because the Lord is the One who holds his hand." (NASB)

Psalm 73:26, "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." (NIV)

Coming Attractions by Marybeth Whalen

This was today's devotional for Encouragement Today on Crosswalk.com

Coming Attractions
by Marybeth Whalen

"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow." James 4:13-14a (NIV)

I live life on fast forward, racing around with my to-do list in hand, eyes on the next thing that needs doing. I love setting goals and achieving them. Very little makes me as happy as crossing off something on my to-do list with a satisfying line of ink.

One day this summer I spent a lazy afternoon watching tv with my niece. She had a feature on her entertainment system that let you watch movie trailers to preview the movies first. We had started out the afternoon intending to select a movie but ended up spending quite a bit of time just watching the trailers. "Sometimes I spend all my time just watching what's coming and never getting to the main feature," she giggled.

Her words hit me as I realized that — too often — that's how I live my life. I focus on what's ahead and don't allow myself the simple pleasure of truly enjoying the main feature: this day, this moment, I've been given.

In my new novel, She Makes It Look Easy, the main character is someone who lives on fast forward too. She has set her sights on the kind of house she wants to live in, the kind of life she wants to have, the perfection she hopes to obtain. She seeks the advice of an influential neighbor in hopes of getting herself to that perfection all the faster. She doesn't stop to think that perhaps in her zeal to do more and better and faster she is losing the gifts and blessings that are in her midst right now.

Sad to say, this novel was born largely from my own experience. My life has been a continual learning process of reveling in today and suppressing the urge to try to lay hold of that elusive tomorrow.

A few months ago I got the very first speeding ticket of my life. As the officer who issued the ticket went back to his car I sat in stunned silence, unable to process what had just happened. My perfect record was tarnished by my inability to slow down and enjoy the ride.

Ever racing to the next thing, my habits had caught up to me. Instead of enjoying the scenery I had reduced it to a dull blur flying past my window. After the shock wore off, I realized the lesson: slowing down, pressing pause, will not only add to the life I live, it can also keep me from harm.

I have endeavored recently to be more deliberate about choosing to pause and see God at work, to catch the little winks He sends my way if I will only look up. I keep a list of these gifts He gives. I write in my journal about what I am learning. I seek Him through His Word and ask Him each morning to bring these truths to mind throughout my day. Sometimes in the roar of my life I stand perfectly still and just listen and smile and say Thank You, Lord. I am learning to focus on the main feature and quit speeding towards the coming attractions.

Dear Lord, today is a blessing from You. Help me to seek out what You have for me in it. I know that You hold my tomorrows in Your hand and in the meantime I can rest in the moment I've been given. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Application Steps:
Instead of focusing on a to-do list today, create a "to enjoy" list and check those things off instead.

Reflections:
What am I missing today because I'm focused on tomorrow? What gifts has God given me that are rushing past me as I race ahead?

Power Verses:
Proverbs 27:1, "Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring." (NIV)

Matthew 6:34, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (NIV)

When Life is Sour

This post is by blogger Lysa TerKeurst.

Mine, Mine, Mine!

"Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:4 (NIV)

Devotion:
I am a magnet for strange.

Seriously.

Recently I was outside with my three dogs soaking up the sunshine. After being in snowy Pennsylvania the weekend before, I needed the warmth of the Carolinas to soak deeply into my bones. Southern girls don't do snow in the spring.

Anyhow, back to the sunshine and dogs. We got a new puppy named "Willow" for Christmas. Well, our other dogs Champ and Chelsea aren't sure what to think of precious, little three-pound, Willow.

She annoys them. In every way.

I thought it would be a good investment for the dog relations in our home if I spent time with them outside to help them all feel the love. So, I sat on the ground and loved on each dog.

They enveloped me in a flurry of wet kisses, fur, and stinky dog breath. I was having a ball. And they were all getting along. Bliss.

Until...Willow came and sat on my lap. Claiming the prized location of closeness with me, I don't think she realized the signal she was sending. Champ suddenly backed up and growled. His tail stopped wagging. And he was not happy.

"Oh Champ," I reassured him, "Willow is a baby. Be nice."

More growling.

"No sir! Champ, be nice. Come here. I can love on you while Willow sits in my lap," I reassured him once again, while rubbing behind his ears.

He seemed to be happy again, and licked my cheek.

More bliss.

But then, out of the blue, he walked beside me, looked straight at Willow, lifted his leg, and drenched me in tee-tee!

What in the world!? I couldn't believe what was happening.

After recovering from my shock and changing my clothes, I Googled it.

Some say Champ was marking his territory. "That's MY mama!"

His strong expression of "MINE" was a stark reminder to me of just how disgusting a heart bent on self can be. Champ couldn't enjoy all he was experiencing in the moment, because he was so laser focused on the one way he felt slighted.

SELFishness! ME! MINE! MINE! MINE!

Several years ago, God challenged me to recognize and refute selfishness by seeing — really seeing all that I've been given. And never looking at a blessing I was given as something just for me. I always make myself think two things...

1. Thank You God for entrusting this blessing to me. I know it is a gift from You.

2. How can I use this as an opportunity to bless someone else? The blessing will be more rewarding if it's not all about me.

Do these things come naturally? Not at first. Not in a 'me first,' Mine! Mine! Tee-tee on others kind of world.

But we aren't called to live according to the norm, doing what comes naturally.

We are called to rise above. Be set apart. Be different. Be pure in every way. "Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure" (1 John 3:3).

What blessing do you have that might need to be shared today? What blessing do I have that might need to be shared today?

Right in the midst of what we're doing today, how can we graciously and purely represent Christ as we RE-present Him everywhere we go?

Good stuff to ponder as I washed my smelly outfit that day.

Dear Lord, thank You for every good and perfect gift You have given me. Help me to put others before me and to have a heart to see them as You do. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Application Steps:
What opportunity has been given to you recently that you can in turn pass on to others? Will you take the initiative to do that today?

Reflections:
The journey will be more rewarding if it's not all about me. Do I agree with this statement? Have I done this before? How will I plan to implement this going forward?

Power Verses:
Philippians 2:3, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." (NIV)

Romans 12:3, "For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." (NIV)

Psalm 133:1, "How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!" (NIV)

"The No and the Nod of God" by Laura Caldwell

The following is from Laura Caldwell's blog Faith Fuel

The No and the Nod of God

I haven't been posting as much, lately--I know. But I've been having a sort of mini revival--all thanks to recently discovering anew that God's No is not the same as God's frown. I suddenly feel so loved and protected, in spite of all the No's I've had.

God's No is not such a bad thing, I've been discovering. But No is not a word we normally enjoy or appreciate.

Think of it: when you were a child and you reached out for something and heard a severe "No!" it was probably not an enjoyable experience. There might have been a No to dessert, a No to getting a toy, a No to going to a party. We remember the No's. And yes, of course, your parents (hopefully) said No to protect you: No to touching hot stoves, No to walking alone at Night, No to staying past curfew, etc etc. But still, a No is not a word we heartily embrace.

The word "No" has gotten a bad rep. And lately I've been discovering that when God says No, He might just be saying "I love you too much to let you go through that door....at least right now." Sometimes No is "Not yet" and sometimes God's No is a resounding Alarm not too unlike the clanging fire alarm that goes off because a call comes into the local fire station that some bo-bo has set their kitchen on fire because they had their dish towel too close to the stove (I have never done that, but I have set my hair on fire when I leaned too close to the candle, once. But no fire truck was needed, thank you).

When God says No it could often mean an indirect Yes to something else--something you don't YET have in mind, but God does. God always has your Best in mind when He answers you. Because He knows the plans He has for you (Jer. 29:11).

Lately I've had a renewed enthusiasm in coming to God in prayer and discovering that I really don't care whether he says No or nods Yes--I just care that He cares, that He bends down to listen to me...and that His Answer is always perfect, always in my best interest. Sometimes it takes me awhile to figure out His answer.

But one thing I know for sure: I'm begining to appreciate and love the No and the Nod of God...because I know that He loves me.